Thankfully, I resolved the issue with my friend. Well... not totally resolved, he's still mad. But not "I will never speak to you again" mad. So that's good.

I'm still beating myself up over that interview thing. I still can't decide whether I'd actually take the job if I get it. I just... hated the other station so much by the end. And I really am frightened of that much driving. When I'm looking for someplace I've never been before, I have a lot of close calls because I'm paying attention to where I'm going more than what I'm doing. You multiply that by the number of hours I'd work a week by how long I end up doing it--and the odds are I'm going to have an accident. I even had two minor accidents in the semester I worked at the other station! And I hate being cooped up in the car all day anyway. Those vans have a lot of inertia, and after a day of that I kind of have this uber-whiplash headache. (not that I'm not honestly, without exaggeration, having headaches every day anyway these days--I think there's something seriously wrong with me but I don't really know what to do about it since that headache preventative stuff never panned out)

But if I only did it for a couple years, I could parlay that experience into a job in corporate video, which is really what I wanted in the first place.

But if I hated it the entire time I was there, would it be worth it? And if I decide, "well, I'll take the job but skip out after a couple weeks if I absolutely hate it" is it worth it? I'd have to do a lot of uprooting to move there if I didn't know I was for sure. Not to mention all the shit I would have to deal with from my mom. I know this is just "a job." And if I take it, I CAN quit. But it feels like... if I pick that, and I don't like it, I'm kind of stuck. Even my dad's been questioning whether I want to do this. He's asked me if I had had the option, would I have stayed with the other station? And I said I didn't know. And he said, "well the only differences I can think of between staying on at the old station and going to this station are 1) positive--maybe you'd have a better working environment 2) negative--having to move so far."

But also to factor in: back then I didn't know that not even stupid friggin' wal-mart would hire me! Can I really afford to just turn down job offers right now? I know I'm not in any financial trouble, as the 'rents are taking care of me. But I really want to leave the nest. I really want my life to begin. I don't want to be the person who is still living with their parents when they're 30, and I feel like I'm swiftly being drawn into that position if I don't do something soon.

I hate making big decisions.

In other news: now my mom seems to be going back on wanting the china. Because my interview is, ironically, up near where my grandpa lives, so it actually would not be a huge problem for me to pick up the china while I'm up there anyway. I mentioned this to her and she was kind of like, "we'll see." Which means, "I'm lazy and don't want to deal with trying to sell it, even if you're willing to pick it up, and I don't just want it laying around our house, even if you want it."