So even though I'm employee of the month, I still feel terribly insecure. I find myself doing things and then being like.... "Crap. What if they interpret it as this horrible way and fire me?" Like.... I suck at adding and subtracting. So if I type in the wrong thing to the register or some person who (and I hate these people when they do this) suddenly comes up with the extra nickel so that they don't have to have me give them three pennies but I already typed in what they gave me...... I always wonder if I'm totally screwing up and giving them way too much change. And all the time I'm shorting people on change too and then having to call a manager to open up the register so I can give them the proper change blah blah blah. Though the latter is less math and just total absentmindedness.

So just the other day, they put these little cards up at the registers that are basically how to make small talk with customers while you're ringing them up. I, for one, found them a tad on the offensive side, like I really HAD been giving a "for dummies" guide for my job. Because seriously, the card says:

Before Transaction: "Did you find everything you wanted today?"

During Transaction:

After Transaction: "Thank you for shopping at the store! Come again soon!"

Yeah. Pretty much what we're saying anyway. And I thought it was hilarious how they left during blank. Like there should be a dead awkward silence there or something, since we couldn't think up something to say. And I pointed that out to Carmax and she thought it was hilarious too, so I actually wrote "Dead silence" on one of the cards in the during space. And in the conver with Carmax, she came up with "Medatative Hum," so I wrote that on one of the others. So I thought, what the hell, and put "crickets chirping," "stare unblinkingly at customer," and "joke about Oprah" (a piece of small talk I actually do frequently abuse, the book from her club has been selling like hotcakes). But after that, it struck me that that was probably kind of a smart-assy thing to do and I felt horrible only I had written it in ink and couldn't take it back and started invisioning myself being fired for being such a wise-ass.

And then, I was talking to Carmax (by the way, have I been spelling it wrong this whole time? I keep wondering if it's really carmex with an E) and she's like, just as insecure. She's convinced boss-boss doesn't like her, especially since there was some incident recently where she did something wrong in front of boss-boss. I myself really have no feeling one way or the other about boss-boss and suspect it's mutual. She doesn't tend to be around that much when I'm doing stuff, more intermediary managers see me day to day.

But anyway, we were both doing some task for boss-boss the other day, and she made some tiny mistake, and boss-boss had no way to know which one of us did it. And this really horrible, mean, petty part of me was shouting, "Tell boss-boss it was carmax! You don't want to be blamed for someone else's mistake!" But thankfully there was another voice going, "Jesus Christ! Don't be such an asshole! It doesn't even matter, and you'd be stabbing someone in the back who has been a good friend to you so far in the back!" that won out.

Then later, Carmax found out she'd made the mistake and felt horrible, and I said, "Well, I didn't tell her it was you, she might think it was me," and she was sooo grateful, and I felt doubly horrible for being so close to selling her out.

In other news: I DO love working there, and I DO love most of my coworkers and at least like the ones I don't love. And I AM employee of the month. So... these are all very good things.

So, in Employee of the Month news, there are all these old printed out sheets on the wall of past employee of the months. Only they're like from 2003 or something. Carmax got the idea of making and putting one up for me. And to be extra random (and cause I was bored, this is over break) I made an origami crane and put it up there.

Good times.

Phoemeister: If I ever start an escort service that's totally going to be our motto
Phoemeister: "because syphilis isn't something you want to pay a lot for"
Phoemeister: Wouldn't I be a great Madame?
Adrienne: So...your whores won't have syphilis, or the ones that do will be a bargain?
Phoemeister: I'm not sure.
Phoemeister: I haven't decided that bit yet.
Adrienne: That's okay.
Adrienne: I think you'd make a decent Madame. In a magenta dress with droopy frills and a lime-green feathered boa. And orthopedic shoes.
Phoemeister: hells yes!
Phoemeister: I like that description
Adrienne: I like the shoes.

I had lunch with Sista today. We hadn't been working at the same time for a little while, so I thought today would be a good day to hang out. We like talking about random other stuff, but I have to say we gossiped about people at the store quite a bit. I feel like I shouldn't be, but I am a very gossipy person. Though, apparently, not as gossipy as Carmax, as Sista and I decided while we were gossiping about Carmax :P

Anyway, I found out some interesting things that I shall now gossip to you via the world wide web. Because... I'm gossipy, dammit.

1) Sista was there the night Kevin* brought in Lenny Kravitz months ago and still remembered how horrible it was enough to actually bring it up in conversation today, thereby making me feel not as bad about constantly harping about it over at KS.

2) I think TII is just weird in general, because according to Sista, he's always doing weird things. Including addressing all the female employees as "Milady." Which he does do, I had actually forgotten about it, but that is hella dorky/weird and thereby makes me feel free to think of any weird interactions we have as weird because of him, not weird because of me.

3) This isn't gossip, but is very fabulous: Sista has a burner, and someday she's going to burn a compilation CD of all the losery one hit wonders I've ever bought (like Spice Girls, Chumbawumba, etc.) and I'm going to bring it in and make people listen to it and be like, "Hey, you thought what I listen to is poppy? Well try this!" The only reason I've never brought in just one of those albums is I don't even know most of the songs on them, and don't care, really. I'd rather just bring in a compilation. Which I could do now! And sista's totally on board, she wants to actually be there when I play it. So rock!

____
* I've given him the nickname Kevin as he looks exactly like this guy I knew at WEAK named Kevin. Only that Kevin was mean. So I used to be irrationally afraid of this guy for awhile until I got to know him and realize he is really nice aside from the liking Lenny Kravitz.

Wow. Already: my pile of stuff on hold bigger than anyone else's. And that's before adding in my sister and brother in law's gifts/requests.

I am thinking people must be slackers and not putting stuff up very fast. Because more than a few said they'd be doing all their christmas shopping that day, and really, I think most people would be buying more than that. Anyway: my pile's huge, now. In addition to the parent/phew stuff, I added a ton of paperback novels. I couldn't find Fever Pitch, but I have How to be Good and a book of short stories editted by Nick Hornby. I have all the Witches books I mentioned, and one of the Asaro books because most of them weren't there. The big bulk-adding agent is probably Kurt Vonnegut. I forgot how freaking prolific he is, actually. And I mean, we didn't even have in all of his stuff, and I decided to forgo the many volumes of personal memoirs for now, too. So I probably didn't need to ask people for suggestions after all :P (though I'll think about it)

Those Evanovich books: probably actually AT my house, my mom consumes mystery novels like candy and I know I've seen that name around. Other suggestions offered: meh, we'll see :P

Damn. I forgot what I actually wanted to post, which was to ask anyone if there's any books I should buy while I'm buying a lot of books at discount price.

So far I'm getting all the Nick Hornby books I have left for sure, and then I'm trying to decide what else. I'm thinking of getting into the Witches of Eileann series, because I read something else good by the author, Kate Forsyth, and maybe some stuff by this author Catherine Asaro (also someone who has a big old series I've never read, but I've enjoyed one non-related book by). I haven't decided on them yet.

But like I said, any suggestions? I really need to bulk up on pulpy genre stuff and abandon some of the more pretentious things that have been making my reading unpleasant lately. Not that pulpy genre stuff can't be good in a broader sense blah blah blah... I just really miss it.

BUT, on the non genre front, I'm considering getting into David Sedaris, who I am always hearing excerpts from that are quite funny, only all his novels are hideously overpriced usually, and Sarah Vowell because she seems interesting and she was a voice in the Incredibles! It can't get much better than that, right?

OH, and also I'm thinking of picking up more Kurt Vonnegut. I've read virtually everything of his there is to read, but a lot of it was at the library, so I don't actually own about half of the stuff of his I read, and I consider him worthy of buying and re-reading.

but like I said: LEAVE ME SUGGESTIONS OR ELSE. :P

So employee appreciation day is coming up soon (Nov 9) and our discount goes up. I am basically going to do all my christmas shopping that day, and have asked all the family members to send in their various requests.

My mom: actually, this is the exception. I'm getting her the new Neil Diamond, which doesn't come out until the 11th or something so I can't get the extra discount and on top of that my regular discount isn't that great since my store overprices CD's so I might be taking a trip to best buy when it comes out. I have this kind of love hate relationship with Neil, where I kind of like him, but know I shouldn't. Also, of course, my mom LOVES him. Neil is to her what Ben Folds is to me. Only he's been her Ben Folds for like twenty years now whereas Ben Folds has only been my Ben Folds for five at the most. And on top of that, I keep reading articles and passing onto her articles about how his next album is going to totally kick ass because the famous producer Rick Rubin is going to turn his career around like he did for Johnny Cash or somesuch. I'm also thinking of, just to add an element of surprise to the proceedings, giving her a book about how great moms are, she loves that kind of sentimental stuff. Anyway, I noticed the guy who did the Blue Day book has two moms' books, and the Blue Day book is moderately cute and inventive, so I figure the mom book would be like that but specifically for my mom.

My Dad: I could do the same thing with a dad's book, only he doesn't love that sentimental stuff, so it'd pretty much be wasted on him. What he picked out for himself were these smutty vampire books he's been reading lately. I don't know for sure they're smutty, but they have a rep for being smutty so I'd rather not actually read them and find out exactly what kind of smut my father is reading and have to gouge my eyes out the next time I see him reading one of them. So I don't know if he doesn't know I know they're smutty, they actually aren't smutty, or he just doesn't think it should be a big deal for me to buy him smutty vampire novels, but it kinda makes me a little uncomfortable. For surprise giftness, though it won't be that huge of a surprise because we always are getting him the same things all the time because he doesn't ever want that much, I'm getting him some Jelly Bellys because he likes those and we sell those\ at the store.

My sister: has yet to e-mail me back. For surprise: I'm thinking something from burts bees. I think Burts Bees is overpriced crap, actually. But everyone else, including said sister, thinks Burt* hung the moon. And we sell a lot of it at the store, so.... On top of this I think I'm going to be getting a list of books from her and my brother in law to buy at my discount price and then have them repay, so it's like they get my discount for that day. I agreed to go through that rigamarole the couple times a year I get the extra discount from what I normally get because they were quite sad when they heard they couldn't use my discount when I first got the job, and I really didn't want to be going through this rigamarole all the time buying them stuff, and I thought this would be a comprimise. Really, it just makes me feel kinda crappy that I'm circumventing the rules. If it were just my sister, I don't think it'd be a big problem, she's not the type to abuse priveleges like that, but my brother in law is quite eager for the discount, and very cheap, and following a very long series of books right now, and I'm pretty sure he's going to make me buy them all for him that day.

Speaking of him: I dunno. I'll just get whatever for him he says, I guess. I am not in his head enough to know what would really be a welcome surprise.

For the 'phew: I think last time I got him some outfits and a rubber duck. The duck was an impulse buy, I had actually committed that year to not get him any toys (and I still think I kept to the spirit of that promise, as bath toys are usually not the type of toys friends and relatives over-buy and clutter up your house with). Anyway, I've not made any promises this year, and I'm pretty sure they know I'm doing all my shopping at my store, so whatever. One thing I'm getting him is one of those ginormous books that have buttons that make noise when you push them. We have a lot of those in bargain books, so they're cheap. Also, I think he'd like one, as anything that makes noises is A-Okay to him. On top of that, since it's nice and cheap I won't get offended when they throw it away cause he gets bored with it or it runs out of batteries or whatever. I decided to get the winnie the pooh one, because while he is too young to really care, my sister has always been a fan of Pooh, and as of now he has several pooh-related toys and decorations (and they bought him Tigger as a halloween costume this year), so this would fit in. Also in the bargain books: this little cardboard house with four little stuffed animals from winnie the pooh, and four little board books (he already has a ton of board books, and frankly, he doesn't yet even like having them read to him, but I thought the little stuffed animals were cute at least). On top of that, I'm getting him this little burt's bees kit that's all baby stuff. It's horrendously expensive for the tiny amount you get of each thing, and he won't care, but it will impress all the losers out there who DO like Burts Bees, and my sister can run down all the unfit mothers out there who don't use bee toothpaste on THEIR babies.

That's about it.

____
* Is it me, or does Burt (at least I'm assuming it's Burt, I'm talking about the guy whose face is on all of the Burt's Bees stuff) not totally look like a homeless man. Which furthers my laughter at how ridiculous it is that so many people think Burt is awesome. Because if a guy like that came up to you on the street trying to get you to buy stuff his bees pooped out, you would be like, "No! Get away from me, crazy homeless guy!" But since they sell it at book stores, suddenly everyone loves it.

Today could've been so horrible. I got like, no sleep last night. And I'm having my period, which since I've stopped taking birth control, has been pretty ouchy.

But it wasn't horrible! It was AWESOME! Why? I was voted Employee of the Month! Meeee! Employee of the month! It rocks so hard. I got a 25 dollar gift card to use at the store, and I get lunch with the boss-boss. I was so excited. And so flattered!

I hear though, that not that many people get that excited about it (boss-boss told me she thought it was nice to see that I did, for a change). But I don't know why. It's so awesome. I mean, even if you didn't care how great you were doing, it's still 25 bucks and a free lunch! And I DO care how I'm doing and have always been terribly insecure as to how well I'm doing/how well people like me at a new place. And this says I am doing well and people do like me. And I'm the first one of the newer employees to get employee of the month. And I apparently won by a much larger margin than most people win. Especially since the boss-boss, Carmax, and I were talking and boss-boss told us that the people from the inventory team kind of cheat every month and form this voting block where they pick one of themselves to vote for every month and they all vote for the person and if the rest of us don't all vote for anyone in particular or are slackers and don't vote, then that person wins.

It was also cool, when I told Carmax, she was really excited for me and kept bringing it up around other people who would then congratulate me (which made it easier to brag without bragging). Carmax and I were actually both slackers, neither of us voted this time. She'd meant to vote for me, she said. I myself meant to vote for this chick who works part time in the children's section. I'm not great friends with her, but she's really nice and always helping me find stuff in the kids section, which I'm admittedly poor at finding things in. In addition, I had recently been at the cash register ringing up this lady who was just raving about how great this chick was, so it seemed to me enough to vote for her about. Honestly, I am kind of apathetic about the voting because I have this mind set that something out of the ordinary has to happen that they get special recognition for, so this gave me something to vote on. Only I was too late and never got around to doing it. And also she wouldn't have won anyway, because apparently I won by a landslide! Boss-boss said that I won by 6 votes which is a much larger margin than there usually is. Boo ya!

So anyway, Carmax and I decided that we're going to vote for this chick next time, and try to get other people to vote for her too (I get the feeling she doesn't have a lot of buddies that would immediately think of voting for her, as she's somewhat shy with most of us). And Carmax says it's her personal mission to get other people as excited about employee of the month as her and I are (even though we were the slackers that didn't vote last time).

I have had a good month (the commendation for splitting my shift, and the corporate account -- which the two ladies I sold that to were in again today, and I was really happy to see them. And apparently they've been back two times since then and they bought a lot of stuff ever since the first time. So it was really awesome to see them again and know that they were that happy because I hooked them up with that account and the store was that happy to have their business and I was that happy to be appreciated for getting their business in our store) but I was a little surprised at the overwhelming edge I had. Boss-boss said it's because whenever anyone wants me to do anything, I'm like, "Okay," and I thought that was cool. I do switch shifts with people quite a lot if they need it because I don't really have anything else going on. Carmax said it was because I have such a big mouth. When she said that, I was like, "What?" And she explained that she can hear my voice all over the store (I am quite loud, actually something I'm not so happy about usually) and she knows if she hears me when she comes in, it's going to be a good day because I'm fun to work with. So that was nice to hear.

I also mentioned it to Sista, and she was like, "I voted for you!" which was cool. That's the other side of the award, other than knowing I do a good job which is nice to know in and of itself. But this other side is popularity, because it's a voting thing. I've always been one of the least popular people in whatever group I happen to be in, but I have been making friends with a lot of people at work. It's nice to know that people who don't necessarily know you have commendation in your file or that you got a corporate account (except they do all know because I was so excited that day I told everyone) like you enough to vote for you (Sista) or at least mean to vote for you (Carmax).

Also, today was pretty cool because I got some compliments on my outfit. I got a skirt this weekend and wore it today. I've always thought skirts were pretty, but I hate short ones because you have to sit just so or else you show everyone stuff you don't want to. And then after awhile I realized that's why I hate skirts, so a few months ago I got a medium one. Only it's like, linen and I have to iron it and it's a pain in the ass and on top of that my mom's a total jerk about it and won't let me leave the house wearing it unless I've shaved my legs which is the line in the sand, I'm just not shaving my legs for any reason ever unless I find a man willing to shave HIS legs for me. Aaaaanyway, I got a couple REALLY long skirts this weekend that are also not linen, so I wore one of them today and people complimented me, which was nice.

So it was a good day.

Oh, also, I find this funny: at dinner the other night I mentioned how I sold my mom the new Rod Stewart album. Then today one of my managers and I were standing right in front of the Rod Steward display and I mentioned the story, and he already knew because Opri (Optimus Prime) had mentioned it at morning meeting one day while I was off. And I told my mom and she's a bit worried now that her buying habits are now a subject discussed at my store's morning meeting. Muahahahah. I found it quite funny but a bit eerie myself.

I finally read through Shaman's Crossing, the new Robin Hobb novel. It was not as good as I had hoped, though it did get better as it went along. I think half the problem is with me, I've read SO many books lately (promos, ones I've borrowed, the few I've bought), and I still have a ton to get through. I think it's ruining my attention span for books, much like I still have not recovered my attention span for movies after watching so many as a film minor.

The thing about Hobb's previous books is she had great characters. I'm not saying a few were not irritating now and again or that the main character's angstyness didn't occaisonally wear on my nerves, but there were a lot of them and they were well thought out and endearing. Whereas the main character in this one is such a good guy that it just got boring.

Like, in a weird way, he kind of reminded me of Huck Finn. This might be a flawed comparison, as it's been a long time since I read Huck Finn and even then I probably only read a few chapters. But the thing about Huck Finn is that you're supposed to all love him for is he has an internal moral compass. He knows what society thinks is wrong (ie helping a slave escape) and even though he tortures himself over it, he does the right thing (by our society's standards, not his own) by doing the wrong thing (helping the slave escape). So... it's all relativism. If instead, he had somehow done something wrong by his society AND our society's standards, I'm sure everyone would hate Huck Finn and think of him as a dangerous maniac.

Anyway, the thing about Nevare, the main character of Shaman's Crossing is that his society forces him into a strict code of conduct, and like Huck Finn, he's always torturing himself if he isn't following it. Unlike Huck, though, Nevare never does anything big that changes anyone's life when he's breaking rules, he just agonizes over stupid things like if anyone thinks he's a coward because he doesn't speak up this once, or if everyone thinks he's a tattletale because he does end up speaking up about something or other. You just want to shout at him, "Jeez. Just go ahead and do something or not do something for once without wondering how your damn father would view it!" So I guess maybe he's the anti-Huck? Meh.

The book DOES get better about midway through when he goes to this military school and meets all the people who are to be supporting characters throughout the rest of the book, which somewhat relieved me as there weren't any particularly memorable supporting characters up until then. And the book REALLY gets better near the end. So I guess I would reccomend it for anyone with a patient streak, though not over the Six Duchies books she wrote, which, in my opinion, were some of the best fantasy books I've ever read (and that's saying something).

The other books I've been reading lately are Inkspell, Wicked, and High Fidelity.

High Fidelity I'm not done with yet, I've been saving for lunch breaks and the like, which makes it slow to finish even though it's a good book. I kind of miss the days where I really had nothing to do and a short or medium book I could finish all in one day, and a larger book maybe took 2. I can't totally immerse myself into the world of the book anymore when I only have a block of an hour or a few hours to read at a time. Which, again, maybe is why I'm having trouble enjoying fantasy as much, it's one of those genres that, in my opinion, is always better when you can lose yourself in it, though obviously I'm on a tangent here as High Fidelity is not fantasy. Anyway, High Fidelity is part of my little campaign to actually read all of Nick Hornby books, because I really do like him but have never gotten around to reading everything of his. So I am. All I have after this is How to Be GOod and Fever Pitch.

Inkspell: ditto not being finished. It's one of the promo books I picked up, and I read part of it when I didn't have anything better to read, and then never came back to it. It's not a bad book, actually. It's YA, but that doesn't really phase me much. The part that does kind of phase me is that it's the sequel to another book I've never read, that I'm too cheap to buy and read so that I understand this one. So: it's a little slow.

Wicked: UGH. Awful. Absolutely awful. Made worse by the fact that it could've been so good, it's got a great premise. It's basically the tale of the Wizard of Oz from the wicked witch's point of view. And I mean, it's a huge bestseller and has gotten rave reviews, so obviously SOMEONE thinks it's good, but I really had to struggle to finish it because I hated it so much. The thing is, even though it's supposedly from the Witch's view, you don't really get in her head that much, and she still seems like kind of a jerk. And you never really understand why she does anything (some things, like this one affair she has, just has no reason, she doesn't seem to particularly love the guy or even lust after him that much, the author just uses it to further his crappy plot). Like, I think it all boils down to her just wanting those shoes really badly because her dad liked her sister better and gave them to her instead of the wicked witch, but then dorothy ends up with them and all, but the author pads it out with this huge allegorical political situation that's just boring and SO transparent about what in real life it's trying to parallel, and just makes you irritated with the wicked witch even more because she ends up like one of those political activists who never really gets anything done or changes anything but bitches about it all the time. You never even get any idea what she's doing for the cause, she could be a terrorist for all we ever figure out about what she's doing, but since nothing ever happens, I assume that she's just an activist for the most part or else a horribly inneffectual terrorist. So basically, I hated her, I hated all the characters he made up to pad it out, and I hated the plot.

I also have about four more promo books I don't know whether I'm going to read or not, three promo books I know for sure that I'm never going to read, an Amy Tan book I'd like to borrow to read, a sports book I promised I'd read, and some biographies that I think I'm going to borrow at some point (Alan Alda, Warren Beatty, and Cary Grant), so basically the list of what I should and/or want to be reading just gets longer and longer as more and more things come out, and I'm somewhat distressed that the large majority of it ISN'T pulp fantasy or sci fi, the genre I tend to enjoy the most.

So I had a great night tonight! (before I go on, I'm giving in and finally coming up with fake names for my coworkers, so if you're like, "who the hell is " whatever weird name I give them, just know I've probably refered to them before but not by fake name or whatever. Really, I dunno why I bother, I could just name names as I doubt they'll stumble in on the ol' blog and if they did they probably could still tell who they are from it blah blah blah I'm just doing it that way, okay!) I had dinner with about three of my coworkers, two of them (Carmax and Sista) had actually gotten off an hour earlier but stayed till when my break was just to have dinner with me, which made me feel warm and fuzzy inside. The other one (Optimus Prime) I think we found out at the last minute got off right then and she was invited. Which, was awesome, because she's awesome too. So I got to have dinner with four of my favorite people from a group that I enjoy being around already. It was kickass!

Oh, and for Phoe From Elsewhere, I just want to mention that at dinner the topic of weird dreams came up, and I think my one coworker's finally topped your Harry Anderson sex dream, as she once dreamed of making out with Optimus Prime (hence me giving her the nickname optimus prime).

I did feel a little bad though, after I got that set up apparently some scheduling thing went wrong and they wanted to move my break. I have the feeling I'm the first one they decide to jerk around on scheduling conflicts nowadays, because I'm so flexible about it, usually. But anyway, since I had dinner set up, I had to say no. It felt kind of bad, but it also felt kind of good, to let them know I'm not a doormat. And I wasn't a jerk about it either, or even uncompromising, I basically said I had plans, but if it was really necessary, I would do it anyway (yeah, I AM a doormat) and they backed down.

And here's something I find a bit eerie: remember how I said I was all annoyed that people always assume I'm amish or something? And the one coworker (a manager, actually) who was all the reason I brought it up because he thought I was all innocent? Well Thinks-I'm-Innocent (AKA TII) has been at it again several more times since then. I remember one day he said that whole thing about misjudging me again over a conversation I was having with someone else about farting (I am always telling people--not real customers, mind you, just coworkers and friends and family--not to go to Barnes & Noble because they fart into their books). And come on! Any fifth grader has probably had a more offensive farting conver than we were that day! I myself have probably had a thousand conversations involving farting and other bowel stuff. When you have bowel problems on the scale I do, it just doesn't gross you out to talk about anything bowel related. So today at close I made some joke to someone about crack.

Again, if you know me, I have a weird fascination with crack. I've never done illegal drugs of any kind, never even drank alcohol before I was legal. But I LOVE joking about crack. I dunno. It's just hilarious! It's crack! A lot of people don't think pot's that bad, so jokes about pot aren't that great. But crack jokes--money in the bank, my friend! And this time TII wasn't all I misjudged you, he was all, it's wrong for you to make jokes about crack and you should just quit. But not in a way that means it's wrong for anyone to joke about crack, just that I'm too innocent or whatever. And then later in the conver I brought up my point about pot not being that funny, and the coworker I was talking to, Hootie, said something about pot jokes being funny while you're stoned or if you're telling them to stoners, and I said something like I've never done pot so I don't have any jokes like that, and TII pipes up again and says that that regains me points. So I'm just curious what TII's thing is, because he's never on any of the other employees about not talking about drugs or farting or whatever.

Explanations of fake names: (TII and Optimus Prime being explained earlier)

Carmax: she claims she's dangerously addicted to carmax, and it's become a running joke with us.

Sista: we were looking at the promo books once and she thought this book title, "things a sista should do" was just hilarious, and as a joke I actually took it, and she occaisionally asks me if I read it yet or if I've picked up any good tips on being a sista

Hootie: Hootie's another one of my favorite people around there. Tonight her and I were talking about fish and she said she read they could only remember like 30 seconds at a time. And she was telling me this story of her friend or sister or someone's fish, named Hootie, that got overfed and how horrible she thought he must feel because (fish frequently die if you overfeed them because they're too stupid to stop eating when they're full) if the last 30 seconds is like his whole life, he feels like he's been dying his whole life. Anyway, that sounds like a sad story but the way she told it it was pretty hilarious.

Gah. Someone was a total bastard to me today. Why do people think they can just shit all over anyone in retail or food service? And another thing: I don't make the rules, okay! If I refuse to give you a discount you think you deserve but you really don't, you're out 25% the retail price of some damn book. If I go ahead and accept it, I'm in hot water with the people who employ me. Got it?

That's one crappy thing about working at a store that offers about a thousand coupons. On any given day, there's at least one coupon valid at the store. And the thing is: people get REALLY pissed off when they misinterpret either when a coupon is valid or they realize that the coupon discount doesn't come off the sale price of something already discounted. And you know what? I'm actually with the store on this one. They have to make a profit somehow, and if something's already discounted quite a bit, we'd actually be losing money if you could use the coupon on it. I do have to say, I'm secretly with the customer when they bitch about how expensive the CD's and DVD's are if you don't happen to have a coupon or a sale. I myself go to to Best Buy most times, even WITH my employee discount. But again: not my fault, people.

In other news: I swear, I really do like my job. It's just easier to muster up the enthusiasm for complaining about utter pricks than the funny guy who bought High Times last night (re: the post earlier today) or the woman who wanted an Orson Scott Card novel earlier tonight who I totally ROCKED her WORLD by knowing everything about the Ender's Game series, or this cute guy I bantered with about Batman Begins. Does that make me a negative person? I guess. But mostly I'm more negative on my blog than in real life.

OH, and here's something awesome: I got a little commendation in my file today from agreeing to a crazy shift change at short notice a few weeks ago. So rock on.

New KS, too. Wherein I love a guy for buying an album I like (positive), announce my love for my new Muppet christmas album (positive), enjoy being able to play Brand New at work (positive), added links to some blogs of bands I like (positive), changed the decor from blue to green (positive), and downed Boulevard of Broken Dreams (negative).

Crap. In all the negativity and then analysis thereof, I forgot to mention my parents visited. I have only myself to blame, I keep giving them the aforementioned coupons. But anyway, it was pretty hilarious. My mom was like, "Where's Little Richard?" and I found Little Richard, and then it turned out she meant Stevie Wonder. Dude. NOTHING in common there. I also sold her the new Rod Stewart album (pure salesmanship on my part, she didn't even know he had a new one, but I knew of her Rod Stewart listening tendencies). I feel justified hanging out with my mom at work, as she actually does buy a buttload of crap, so is a real customer. In a way: I have to admire her. I have this weird part of me that feels bad about myself when I buy a lot of useless stuff, even when it's well within my means, but she doesn't seem to. I mean, the two stevie wonder albums are getting three or four listens, tops. I see Rod faring slightly better at 10 or 15 listens. But I feel bad buying an album if I think I'll only listen to it for a month or two, or will only like a few tracks or something. Then again, being more of a saver is also a good thing. Anyway, I enjoyed their visit, and between them buying stuff and me buying the muppet album, we have 9 more coupons, so I think they might be visiting again next week. I can string them along forever in this fashion, muahahahaha.

Phoemeister: those lesbians put subliminal messages in tv
Tina: not so far fetched considered they throw in gratuitious lesbian scenes in just about every movie
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: every movie?
Phoemeister: what movies are you watching?

Closing time, bada ba ba bada ba ba ba ba ba ba ba.....

I've been closing a lot this week. Despite my nightowlness: I really do prefer mornings. Oh well.

I was going to go into rambly things after that but then I decided not to, like seeing "Alzheimer's for Dummies," and this guy who was inordinately proud of buying a copy of High Times. Because I typed some of it out and was like, "Man. I wouldn't want to read this." So.... yeah.

New Karaoke Supernova

Yeah, I've actually been doing a lot lately...... and not feeling like blogging much. As opposed to usually, where I do nothing and yak on forever. So.... yeah.

Phoemeister: You know, you'd think the retail business would be good for picking up guys
Phoemeister: but none of my customers are hot for me
Phoemeister: How can they not want to get with this?
Sui: haha
Sui: I dunno!
Sui: maybe they just want the books
Phoemeister: bastards
Sui: you guys do suggestive selling right?
Sui: like when they go to check out.. you try to push something else on them?
Sui: like "would you like to get a hat with all this today?" or something
Sui: you need to start asking the hot guys if they want to buy the kama sutra
Phoemeister: LOL
Sui: with a free copy of your phone number on the inside cover
Phoemeister: I'll keep that in mind
Sui: or!
Sui: just start writing your number on the inside cover of all the sex books
Phoemeister: LOL
Sui: "Want to try some of these out? Call me.."
Phoemeister: roflmao
Sui: "P.S. No Fatties"

New Karaoke Supernova re: Stubbs the Zombie.

Proof that Ryan is Weinerless

Sui: that and eddie izzard's theory
Phoemeister: What's his theory?
Sui: hitler was a painter.. and probably not a very good one.. so he just got really angry and was trying to paint . "Oh, damnit I cannot get zee trees right.. I WILL KILL EVERYONE!"
Phoemeister: I've heard he was a painter
Phoemeister: but I wonder if he really did suck
Phoemeister: and what he painted
Phoemeister: can you really see hitler painting some calm landscape?
Sui: haha
Sui: you know he totally was all bob ross-ish before he went crazy jew-slaughtering mad
Phoemeister: ROFLMAO
Phoemeister: that's the best line ever, aside from earlier, when you told me you wanted to eat your own retarded baby
Sui: haha
Sui: i'm just full of the "BLO" today
Sui: (best lines ever)
Sui: er ble
Sui: unfortunately my lack of wiener has ruined my typing

NYC: barnes and noble is better than *the store I work at*
Phoemeister: munch me
Phoemeister: all the people at barnes and noble secretly fart into their books
NYC: i secretly fart into the books at *the store I work at*
Phoemeister: Wow, all that time it was you
Phoemeister: I wondered what the smell was
NYC: actually, that smell was/is you
NYC: but i do fart into your books

Today was AWESOME. It's educator's appreciation weekend at the store, so educators could come in and get a discount and there were some raffles and things. And it was nice and busy, so I got to help people and stuff. And everyone was so happy because they were getting discounts that it was just a happy place to be around.

BUT, the awesomest part: I landed a corporate account today! It'll be my first one!

Basically: we offer several types of corporate accounts, where people can buy stuff for their business and get a discount or a billing acount or blah blah blah blah. Whenever we see anyone buying a large quantity of something, we're supposed to push the corporate account, but I've never really had an opportunity to before.

But today, there were these two sweet old ladies buying DVD's for a library, and I came up and asked them if they needed anything, and it turned out they wanted a ton of DVD's. And it was easy work finding them, because they pretty much wanted popular titles where I knew where they would be. And they were so nice to me. And they loved me, because apparently they'd gone to some other store before that and the people there weren't helpful at all. And they'd decided to do the shopping today because of the educator's discount for educator appreciation weekend, but they asked me if the discount would ever cover any other times in the future, and it doesn't, but if they signed up for a corporate account, it would cover future times, so I told them so and they were totally on board for it.

Also awesome: the head manager at the store, kind of the boss of everyone was RIGHT THERE when I brought them and this gigantic tower of at least 40 DVD's up to the register, and a corporate account with them. And she was going over a few other benefits of the account with them and said, "you can even call us up and tell us to do all the work finding things for you when you have a corporate account" and they were like, "Oh, we didn't do any work at all today! Phoe was SO helpful, she found everything for us!" And after they went, the boss gave me a high five!

Topping it off: I have two days off, now. And I've checked out two more books, bought a book, my dad rented movies, I'm going to hang out with my one high school friend, and my parents are taking me out to lonestar for some steak lunch tomorrow. Does life get any better than this?

Phoemeister: Oh, I have another Dummies book related anecdote for you
Sui: haha okay
Phoemeister: we saw cutting hair for dummies (me and a coworker)
Sui: haha
Phoemeister: and I said I didn't want a dummy cutting my hair, and she was like, "yeah, I wouldn't really want them reading out of that book WHILE they were cutting my hair."
Sui: haha yeah
Phoemeister: and then I was like, damn, there should be a dummies book for selling books. I'd like, read out of it robot like, "Hello, how are you today?"
Phoemeister: "Did you find everything alright today?"
Phoemeister: "Okay, next I offer you free coupons."
Sui: hahah
Sui: brilliant
Phoemeister: but then RIGHT AFTER THAT, on accident, I did find Selling for Dummies
Phoemeister: and I carried it around for like a half hour
Phoemeister: but no one noticed except the one coworker, who I specifically found and showed it to, re: our earlier discussion
Phoemeister: but we found it pretty hilarious
Sui: haha that is good
Phoemeister: yeah
Phoemeister: I actually did see someone I knew from TV-10 after that while I was carrying it around and I told her about it and she thought it was pretty funny
Phoemeister: she said she used to work at barnes and noble and everyone there made fun of raising children for dummies
Sui: hahah
Sui: that's terrible
Phoemeister: yeah
Phoemeister: did I tell you I saw prostate cancer for dummies a couple days ago?
Sui: haha
Sui: how the hell can you have a book about that?
Phoemeister: well, there are a lot of disease books where if you have the disease it tells you how to deal with life now that you're totally screwed
Phoemeister: my mom has a ton of books on how to live with diabetes
Sui: haha
Phoemeister: I would assume it's in that vein
Sui: "brain cancer for dummies"

Sui: Chapter 1
Shoot yourself.
Phoemeister: 10 to 1 there's a colitis for dummies floating around out there to make me feel bad about myself

Holy COW.

There's this guy who's a regular at the store that I've found eerily familiar for some time now, and I had no why. And then I was re-reading my blog tonight (yeah, I'm a loser) and read this post from when I was still at TV-10 where my reporter and I went to a pet supply store that was selling dog biscuits shaped like donkeys and elephants re: the presidential election.

I think the main thing I remember from that is my reporter ate a dog biscuit on camera, and we all thought it was hilarious.

BUT, it made me remember, the store owner called a couple of her regular customers up so there would be some actual dogs for our B-roll. AND THAT GUY WAS ONE OF THE DOG OWNERS.

It's a small world after all.

Phoemeister: do you know what killed me?
Sui: probably the colitis
Sui: but that's in the future, Phoe
Sui give it time
Phoemeister: LOL, you're such a bastard :P

Well, I'm not dead, I just haven't been doing much lately.

At work the big thing is we're shifting ALL our CD's to make room for another rack of DVD's or books or something. Pain in the ASS. Also, I'm especially bad at it because of my freakishly small hands, I can only hold a few CD's at a time, and we're trying to move them in mass quantities....

I also had some of those new nachoes they've been yacking on about in the taco bell ads. Really, I'm surprised they never thought of having nachoes with real meat instead of disgusting taco meat before this, given all the stuff they've invented over the years. (I mean, gorditas? That's not real mexican food, even, I bet they made it up). But they were pretty good. This, also, was actually the first time I've been to the taco bell near my work over break. Weird, given my well-documented love of the Bell, huh? For some reason I had just gotten into this habit where I'd eat chips or crackers in my car during break. So going to taco bell for fancy nachos is probably a step in the right direction, here.

New KS I think. I dunno, I can't remember if I ever mentioned the last post on here, it actually WAS a couple of days ago. At anyrate: it's the one where I get pissy because someone at work did not share my profound love for the Refreshments, so if you've read that, you're pretty much caught up.

Man.. I just reread that post and I have to conclude that blogging isn't probably the best thing to do while on Tylenol PM. Actually, Tylenol PM is probably the worst drug known to man, yet I take it every night. Which is probably abusing the Tylenol PM, but I'm not exactly sure what else to do. Aside from at least not blogging while on it.

Anyway, I just finished the Neil Gaiman book, Anansi Boys. It was good, but it was no American Gods. Actually, it's not really a sequel. The main character is the son of a minor character in American Gods. So more it's a spinoff. And it doesn't even have the same tone... American Gods was really gritty and serious, but Anansi Boys actually more reminds me of Good Omens, a funny novel NG wrote with Terry Pratchett some time ago. But, despite not being what I expected, I liked it fairly well.

Otherwise, I've been doing not much, watching TV and listen to music and... well, fiddling around on the computer, as you can clearly see.

Sui: have I ever mentioned that you have terrible timing?
Phoemeister: it's my job to have bad timing
Sui: haha
Sui: it better pay well
Phoemeister: not really
Phoemeister: actually, my day job in the retail industry pays better
Sui: well I hope they don't expect you to be at work on time
Phoemeister: actually, they expect me to not be at work on time
Phoemeister: as the whole point is having bad timing :P
Sui: that's kind of nice
Phoemeister: you know it
Phoemeister: that's why once in awhile I fuck it up and actually come on when you have time to talk to me
Sui: haha
Su: I think the best part of that job.. is that you'd be required to look at porn just when your boss walked by
Phoemeister: LOL
Phoemeister: maybe you should look into getting this job
Phoemeister: you could be my assistant
Phoemeister: the whole looking at porn thing could be your responsibility
Phoemeister: I would delegate
Sui: haha
Sui: nice
Sui: "oops I accidentally masturbated at work just when a co-worker came to talk to me"
Suibrom: "Ryan, your timining is particularly bad.. it's time you got a raise"
Phoemeister: I'd BE your coworker
Phoemeister: and I'd have to praise your work
Sui: haha
Sui: praise!
Phoemeister: I'm not going to praise you! You don't even have the job yet, this is the interview
Sui: yeah but the fact that I was totally late to the interview, and walked in on the boss sleeping with the secretary should guarantee me the job
Phoemeister: well
Phoemeister: seeing as how you're lying
Phoemeister: about walking in on the boss and being late
Phoemeister: to someone who clearly knows you're lying
Phoemeister: yeah, I guess that guarantees you the job
Sui: nice

A couple days ago, I had two days off of work right together. And then I worked two more days. And here I am again, with two more days off. I could get to like that work ratio.....

....except what it probably means is I'm going to be stuck working 10 days in a row until I get another day off, which will kind of suck.

But on the plus side: having so many days off recently actually made me feel energized enough that today my family went out to lunch and shopping, and I actually came with. So I got a good lunch at Noodles (best. restaurant. ever.) and some goodies paid for by my mom.

Said goodies consisting of:

1) Gloves. Really, I don't need gloves that bad, but I DO tend to like to have a pair for every coat so I can keep them in the coat and not be stuck without gloves because I forgot which coat I keep them in. Plus, they're really cute. They're various shades of red, very thick and cozy. They're furry, like, Cookie Monster furry, I've been calling them my "muppet hands." Though they're red, I avoid comparing them to Elmo, as he is not a muppet I'm a fan of. And that's saying something, I'm all about muppets. Tangentially, one coworker of mine has been calling me a "muppety bitch." We were discussing the picture of Dolly Parton on her new album, and I said she looked "muppety." Because she DOES. I don't know if she's had plastic surgery or what, but if you've seen that picture, you KNOW I'm telling the truth about her looking muppety. Then, my coworker came up with the phrase "muppety bitch," and we thought it was hilarious. So... yeah, that story never went anywhere. I just wanted to share with people the joy of the phrase "muppety bitch," while I was on the topic of muppets anyway.

2) Purple button down shirt. I don't have to dress up for work, but I kind of like it. I don't know if I'm trying to kid myself that my job's more important that it is, or if I have a latent clotheshorse gene just sprouting, but lately I've been all about dress shirts.

3) Teal suede purse. Okay, if you know me very well you're going: purse? Because I don't carry around a purse, and haven't since high school. First off: purses are way inconvienent. Secondly: I have the (completely understandable given my absentmindedness) gigantic fear that I'll just set it down and leave it somewhere. BUT: occaisionally you need a purse, if you're a girl, because those bastards don't put pockets in dress pants or dresses or skirts, so if you dress up, you're stuck bringing a purse. And the purse I do have is pretty ugly. And my mom was pressing me to get a purse since we saw them on sale. I think she secretly hopes I'll love the purse so much that I'll take to actually using a purse and become more ladylike, but I don't think that's going to happen. I was going to stay strong on the no purse front, but my sister pointed out "how much longer is Mom going to buy you stuff anyhow? You might as well." Oh, and another thing about purses: I don't embrace the "tiny shoulder strap so you basically have to wedge the thing under your armpit" trend, but that's all there was, so I guess if you ever see me with my purse, I'm going to look like one of those idiots with my purse wedged under my armpit.

Also, my sister gave me some of her clothes that she's too skinny for now. Seriously, who else gets THINNER from having a baby? But I can't hate the phenomenon, it got me some new clothes.

I also got to hang out with the 'phew. It's been some weeks since I did such because my sister doesn't seem to schedule these family get together things when I'm off work, and sometimes when one does coincide with when I'm free, I am dead tired and don't feel like it. Anyway: it was great. He was in a very happy mood (which doesn't always happen, you know how kids are. Plus, he is literally sick ALL THE TIME. I swear, there must be plague rats at that day care of his or something) and was happpy to play. Also, he still recognizes me and likes me (though maybe not as much as the rest of the family, *sigh* I hope when he gets older he likes to read because then AHA I will be his favorite because we have tons of cheap children's books around the store that would even further be discounted for me). Anyway, I won't dote too much, as that gets boring to read, but (and I have had this confirmed by some coworkers who saw him the last time my sister visited the store) he is the cutest EVER. And he's old enough that he can run around a little (not without the assistance of a cart or someone holding his hands or something) and throw stuff around a little, so we had a grand old time playing together.

Oh, also I borrowed some books from the store, which is a job perk. Though: not that much of a perk, when you think about it, as you can easily do that at the library. Still convenient though. I got the new Neil Gaiman, the sequel to American Gods, and I have high hope for it. I also got (and have read already) the new Nick Hornby novel and it is awesome as ever. I have some thoughts about it up at Karaoke Supernova

So, I must look like the most vanilla person ever. Because, as you can read in my blog, I curse a moderate amount. But whenever anyone I don't know all that well hears me curse, or I admit that I curse: they're all surprised. OR curse themselves at some point and then apologize to me for cursing around me like I'm the square who can't take cursing or something.

That happened with one coworker today.

Then, another coworker, who we had a whole long conversation re: cursing earlier so she knows my position on it, was saying something or other was a CF, and I was like, "What's that?" and another coworker was all, "Don't corrupt her by telling her that!" And it turned out it was clusterfuck. Which, I know what that is. I just am bad with acronyms.

Then, after I left them to do something else, I was thinking, "If they only knew," because I have a TON of absolutely filthy AIM conversations. I think I happen to curse more on AIM because AIM's mostly where I talk to people who don't get mad at cursing. And I got a little grin because I was thinking of some of the more amusing filthy conversations I've had, and yet another coworker was all asking why I was smiling (which, btw: I hope you, dear reader, know that that's the most annoying thing ever because 9 times out of 10 the thing you're thinking of either 1) an inside joke that involves a lot of explaining and is really not worth it for the person or 2) something completely inappropriate. And this was both, so I just lied and said it was because I was having a particularly good day.

Oh, and later, the clusterfuck coworker was talking about something to do with strip poker and how you'd probably want to be drunk first. And I agreed, I can't really see myself doing strip anything without a little booze in me. So apparently she gave some version of this exchange to the "don't corrupt her" coworker that apparently made it sound like I get drunk and play strip poker all the time, because he came up to me later and (this is all in a jocular tone, of course, not really judging me or anything) basically tells me he misjudged me because he thought I was sweet and innocent and all that and here I am telling about my love for drunk strip poker.

Which, I don't get drunk, or play strip poker, much less do both in conjunction, but I find it weird that automatically people assume I'm this sober, non-stripping-non-cursing person.

Note to self: come up with a better way to refer to individual coworkers. The problem is I'm too lazy to come up with fake names for all of them, initials won't work because there's a lot of duplicates, and Tina and various guys named Ryan are the only people I use their real name on here because they're the only ones that already know I insult them on this blog all the time and don't mind.

Phoemeister: I think you should just not do any work
Phoemeister: and talk to me all day
Sui: that'd be an awesome job
Phoemeister: aw, thanks :-)
Phoemeister: if I made more than a buck over minimum wage
Phoemeister: maybe I'd pay you for it
Sui: haha thanks
Sui: you need to start making the big bucks
Sui: so you can pay me to slack all day
Phoemeister: eh
Phoemeister: just move here and you can get paid in sex
Sui: haha
Sui: nice
Phoemeister: I mean, that's what you'd blow all the money on anyway, right?
Sui: well yeah
Sui: but can you compete with robots?
Phoemeister: ......
Phoemeister: damn
Phoemeister: no
Phoemeister: I can't compete with robots
Sui: don't feel bad, no woman can
Sui: that would be an awesome job though
Sui: if my job were to just slack off all day
Sui: and I was paid in sex
Sui: I totally need to find a job like that
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: find some old lady
Phoemeister: be the male Anna Nicole Smith
Sui: haha
Sui: can she not be old?
Phoemeister: well she's either old
Phoemeister: or ugly
Phoemeister: why else does she need you?
Sui: ther are attractive young business women that have money to spend
Sui: entertainment of course
Sui: I'm very entertaining
Phoemeister: but not all attractive young business women want to hear what you think of Pi

I finished Julie & Julia. And it was GREAT. I think I have this voyeuristic part to me that just loves reading people's memoirs. But weirdly, I have trouble enoying a lot of memoirs. Some people who have written memoirs have done great things and all, things worth reading about, but they (or their ghostwriter) just can't write for shit and it all turns out quite crappy.

But then there are people who might not have done anything THAT spectacular, but they were born with the writer's gene and their small achievement (in Julie's case, going through 540 Julia Child recipes in a year) seems enthralling and witty and touching even if, like me, you could'nt've given less of a crap about cooking when you started the book.

So I would reccomend it, if you give a crap about what I think about books at all, which you probably don't :P

Also, her blog's here if you want to be cheap and read her archives instead of buying the book, though obviously the book and blog aren't exactly the same.

I'm feeling kind of strapped for time, recently. Because I had endless time before the job and.... well, now I don't. I kind of went into how it's making me fear for my music sensibilities on Karaoke Supernova, but now I'm going to also say: it's really cutting into my reading time.

Since I got the job, I've only read 2 books I genuinely wanted to read, the Nick Hornby essay book and the one about Jacob Slichter, the drummer from Semisonic. The thing is: our store is really great for nonfiction, but it seems in fiction we only really get what sells. And I'm the type who likes to just go to the sci-fi/fantasy section, see if a title or book cover catches my attention, read the blurb on back, and if I like it, get the book. Which is usually by some no-name. This is why I find it hard to browse in a library. And why, in our bestseller-obsessed store, I haven't really found any fantasy to read.

Also, I keep picking up our promo books because they're free. And they kind of suck, but I can't not finish them because no matter how crappy a book is I kind of get invested and want to see how it turns out. I seem to have a tendency to pick up chick lit, which is the worst type of book imaginable. I mean, if you've ever seen the movie version of Bridget Jones: that is exactly the formula for every chick lit book ever, only most of them suck at it because none of them are funny in the slightest and whoever the character standing in for Bridget is usually as vacuous and annoying and opposite from bumbling, loveable Bridget as possible. Whoever does the Hugh Grant role isn't a funny jerk, just a jerk. Whoever does the Colin Firth role is this blandly boring hard to believe he's so perfect guy.

Seriously, it's like: irritatingly fashion-obsessed woman also obsessed with meeting the perfect man meets horrible man. horrible man screws her over. woman meets better man, and true love ensues. In EVERY one. Even this (yeah, I don't know why I picked up this one) CHRISTIAN version of the ol' formula I read.

The ONLY good book I've picked up so far in the promos (which.... I'm not all the way through it, and I'm not all the way through two of the other books I picked up when I got this one) is Julie and Julia. It's about this woman who took this old Julia Child recipe book with 540 recipes and decided to make them all within a year's time. But really, it has very little to do with the food and more how the whole thing affected her life and what was going on with her and her friends at the time. And it's really interesting, kind of like reading someone really interesting's blog: which, she had a blog during this whole thing, so maybe that's it. I think I'll look it up sometime, but am too lazy to do that until I at least finish the book.

So basically I've been reading crap lately. Crap that's not even in my favorite genre of crap. When I have time to read at all.

Good times.

Phoemeister: speaking of work, this woman was a total bastard to me today
Sui: that sucks.. but that will happen
Phoemeister: Really, people are nice to me on the whole, but the last couple days I've gottne a few prize winners
Sui: gimme the good stuff
Phoemeister: anyway, I couldn't find this CD for her, so she goes and asks one of my coworkers
Phoemeister: and he tells me afterwards she complained to him about how rude I was to her
Phoemeister: when I wasn't rude to her
Sui: hm that sucks
Phoemeister: I just couldn't find a cd that was not there to find
Sui: how did she think you were rude?
Phoemeister: well, I didn't get any details, he was just like, "She told me you were all rude to her" and then I asked a few people who had been around about it later and the general consensus was "you are alright, she's just stupid"
Sui: haha okay
Phoemeister: but still. What if she'd said that to one of my managers or something?
Sui: that's good : )
Sui: well
Phoemeister: and do you know what kills me?
Sui: then hopefully your managers have the common sense to ask you
Phoemeister: all of this wasn't even over a good CD
Sui: haha
Phoemeister: she wanted to find this CD so crappy that it came out today and we only have one (I mean, we have at least two or three of even the most obscure bands) and the guy who made it is like Brandy's younger brother. So you've gotta think he's basically the Ashlee Simpson of R & B, except no one's even heard of him aside from this one bitchy middle-aged woman.
Sui: haha
Sui: did you explain that to her?
Phoemeister: no
Phoemeister: that would've been rude :P
Phoemeister: people are stupid though
Phoemeister: I mean, am I god?
Phoemeister: can I make the CD just appear?
Sui: yes!
Phoemeister: can I just pull it out of my ass and hand it to you?
Sui: that would be a neat trick
Phoemeister: well.... thanks for the vote of confidence
Sui: of cousre : )
Sui: i'm here to help
Phoemeister: yeah. It would save on money if I could just pull whatever album I wanted out of my ass. Something tells me, though, even if I could, I wouldn't pull out "Raydiation" by Ray J, Brandy's brother, of my ass.
Sui: haha
Sui: god I'd hope not.. but that would explain the quality of the album

So I've been working, working, working. And watching movies.

Just like heaven: meh. Alright for what it is, but no shocker.

Serenity: Man. I've been waiting for that movie since Firefly got canceled. I had huge expectations.... so, yeah, I was let down a little. The problem is: Firefly is very character driven, which is why I loved it so much. But most movies: plot-driven. Because rarely does anyone want to see a movie that doesn't go anywhere, and they don't have as much time to fool around with as a TV series, even one only on for one season, does. So of the 8 characters, only a couple got any time for character development, and the others are just like, hanging around. Also, people who never watched the show probably got even less out of it, as they have no idea what the dynamic is among this group of people. So the verdict: alright, but I really wish they'd just not been morons and cancelled the show in the first place.

The other day at work I rang up this prof I used to have for these two film classes who made us all miserable with busywork and horrible films. He didn't recognize me, but apparently one of my coworkers once had a class with him and he recognized HIM, and it irritated me. That guy made my life miserable for a semester and destroyed my attention span for watching movies for all time! The least he can do is recognize me.

Also the other night I had a dream about work. Where I basically just did everything I do at work every day. Worst dream ever. I mean, a nightmare is almost better than just doing the same thing every day and then doing it again at night in your dreams. I like my job.... but that's crazy.

I think I got my first certifiable jerk customer the other day, too. By in large, I've been pleased at how few really mean people I've gotten (though I've gotten a few dumb people. "Hey, can I use this coupon today that says it isn't good till a week from now?" Question asked, and answered, lady.) And I really don't mind customers who make the whole thing a pain for me if they're nice about it. But this lady WAS a pain (getting mad at the coupon regulations, deciding not to buy something after all, making me use the coupon on something else, getting all mad that the other coupon was on something she didn't want it used on blah blah blah) AND a total bitch to me, like I make up the coupon rules!

ANYWAY, that all sounded kind of whiney, but I am kind of whiney, so deal with it :P

Tina: did you notice blogger added a button at the top of the blogs that lets people Flag your blog for objectional material?
Phoemeister: no, I hadn't
Tina: it's at at the top on the right
Phoemeister: hunh
Phoemeister: yeah, I see it now
Phoemeister: I'm going to flag yours
Phoemeister: psyyyyyyyyyyych
Tina: dude :-P what if it shuts down my blog?
Phoemeister: I wouldn't do that to you
Phoemeister: I bet it wouldn't
Tina: I didn't think you would but I don't know what kind of sugar high your on right now
Phoemeister: I bet it's just for blogs that are like, "I love the KKK, btw: here's some kiddie porn"
Phoemeister: lol
Phoemeister: I'm tempted to flag my own blog to see what happens
Phoemeister: like if I get a warning or something
Tina: I don't know, unless you get some one admin or something with a thing against Ben Folds and vaporub, you should be ok
Phoemeister: LOL.... true
Phoemeister: what about ben folds combined with vaporub?
Phoemeister: that could be some very specialized porno
Phoemeister: exclusive to my site
Tina: salve
Phoemeister: I don't get it

He is Franz Kafka! Franz Kafka!

So I spent a lot of time in the Cage today again. I have to say that's not my favorite, but whatever, it's not that bad. It's fairly decent, in that you get things done a lot faster when there's no customers breathing down your neck.

I also had a pleasant surprise. I think I've mentioned it before, but at like, 8:00 every day we have morning meeting where they tell us what the big new releases are and what's been mentioned in the media and what should sell well etc. and then we each give a reccomendation. You CAN pick something that's a favorite of yours from old times, but most of the time you kind of want to pick something that's come out recently or has a new tie-in like a movie or sequel or something. So last week I reccomended the new Coheed & Cambria CD a couple of times because it was the only "new" thing I'd read/seen/heard recently, and it is pretty good.

Well, apparently today we got in a little display for the CD, which is kind of late because it was new two weeks ago. Plus, we only have like 5 of them in stock anyway and nowhere to put the display, so it was just going to go into the garbage. But one of the managers remembered that I'd been reccomending it, and there was this little booklet attached to the display with some pictures and lyrics and stuff, and he saved it for me, which I thought was really nice of him and I was also impressed that he remembered. So I TOTALLY forgive him for dissin' Ben Folds (he was the one who did that). And he's pretty cool anyways, so I wasn't really carrying a grudge about it anyway, but this just made me feel really warm and fuzzy.