It's weird how site stats make you realize how strangely obsessed people on the net are with things. I mean, I knew porn. So all the ponr I get, not that weird. But, I swear, since I mentioned my youthful shag, I have gotten nonstop shag hits. Dude, the shag sucks, unless you're Florence Henderson circa Brady Bunch times. If you want to go crappy/tacky/ugly, just skip shag all together, and go for a mullet, man.

Second most surprising: all the vapo rub hits I get. Especially the vaporub + fungus ones.

Third: the band Matt's Dad's Basement should get their own website, because I'm getting all of their traffic.

Fourth: Why am I getting all the Spongebob Squarepants hits? I only like mentioned him once, and now I'm like, the leading authority.

Fifth: Ditto for the lead singer of Sum 41

Sixth: "Minerva Impression Crack" constantly. Usually on foriegn search engines

Seventh: That song in the mitsubishi commercials

Eighth: those AWFUL AWFUL AWFUL pants with "Bootylicious" written on them. I hope someone searches on it and finds this post and reads it, so I can insult them like this: YOU ARE A MORON. THOSE PANTS WITH BOOTYLICIOUS WRITTEN ON THE ASS ARE THE TACKIEST TASTELESS PIECE OF CRAP I'VE EVER SEEN, AND YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED AT YOURSELF FOR DOING A SEARCH FOR THEM. Ha.

Anyway, here are the funniest lately:

#3 on yahoo for: Redneck Keychains

Mebbe you can find them at the libary. (get it? Libary?)

#6 on german google for: Klingon+fantasy-swords

Dude, that's so uncool. Klingons don't have swords, they have batleths. Duh.