FUCKING WEATHER! JUST GET BETTER ALREADY SO I CAN JUST FUCKING TELL MY PARENTS I AM GOING TO LAS VEGAS.

And every day I wait the more I just want to tell my mom, and screw the flowers, and her enjoyment of Mother's Day because she's making me miserable already about something else.

One reason it sucks to live with my mother while carrying on an arguement with her is because she NEVER LETS IT END. She just pokes and pokes and pokes and pokes and worries at it like a terrier. Somehow, accidently letting it slip yesterday that there is no closet in the appartement I want has opened some sort of floodgate of rage that she heaps on me day and night. Well... floodgate of rage implies fights. No, no actual fights. Just guerilla sneak attacks, which brings me back to the fact that it sucks to live with her while she's mad at you because no matter what you are doing she'll just randomly come up to you, interupt what you are doing, and tell you some new horrible thing she's thought of.

So I'll be reading, and she comes up to me, "You know, I couldn't live without a closet. It's inhuman." And she says it in that half-joking way people say things that they REALLY mean but play off as a joke so that you don't kick their ass for saying something bastardy like that.

I'm in my room listening to music and she interupts me with, "It just breaks my heart that you're going to go and live in this place! It keeps me up at night! I'm so worried about you!"

This, she says so sincerely that I admit I giggled a little. Because she sounds like she's persuading me not to live in a crack house or Rwanda. This is a studio appartement in a good neighborhood! Not even that far from where I live now.

"You'll have to park on the street! And is this a first floor appartement or a second floor appartement?"

"Second..."

"See!?!? See!?!?"

"I don't mind walking up a couple of stairs."

"What about moving?"

"I guess I'll do it somehow."

"You won't even have enough room to have a couch and a bed!"

....and again, I cop to being a smartass, but I start giggling again and am like, "Hello! I told you I was getting a loft!"

Then today I'm watching TV and she interupts me to tell me that she doesn't think the couch I want to use (this old one we have collecting dust in the basement) would fit under a loft. Oh, and I think another time while I was reading she told me that if this whole thing is because of Mouse (which, by the way, she has this irritating tendency to blame actions I take that she doesn't like on other people "putting ideas in my head") that I don't owe him anything, I haven't known him that long, and screw him I'm never going to see him again anyway. I think that's a pretty shitty way to look at anything, by the way. "Oh, it's alright to screw people as long as you yourself will not have to deal with the negative fallout."

But it's not just because I gave him my word. It's also because you are easily demonstrating to me why I hate living with you, right this very moment.

If I don't fucking get this appartement I will want to die. So.... everyone focus all your positive energy on this, just in case it helps. I would do the same for you!

Also, if anyone wants hang out, let me know: I will do anything to get out of the house right now. Sure, she'll just save her slings and arrows for when I get back, but at least I will not constantly be looking over my shoulder the whole while for another stupid ambush.