Phoemeister: Have you ever had one of those pre-made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches?
Sarcasmyst: *shudder* no
Sarcasmyst: are they scary?
Phoemeister: Nah. They're fine. I'm having my very first right now. Which is why I brought it up. Anyway, I bought it because I was like, "I remember bringing pbj sandwiches to school when I was little, and the jelly soaked thru the bread in like 2 hours. How can these not be soaked thru? This must be some space age bread or jelly, man!"
Sarcasmyst: *laughs* The bread is secretly plastic.
Phoemeister: Anyway, I'm eating it and I noticed: there are 2 thin layers of P in which the J is safely ensconced, insulating the bread. I was like, "My god! That's genius! I would've never thought of that in a million years!" Anyway, I'm not thinking I'm going to make this a trend, because how lazy are you if you can't make your own PBJ sandwich. People are SO lazy. I mean, me too. But I'm going to make my own PBJ sandwiches.
Sarcasmyst: *laughs*
Sarcasmyst: I'm so jealous...
Sarcasmyst: I TOTALLY am craving PBJ now.
Sarcasmyst: Evil person
Phoemeister: sorry
Sarcasmyst: You are so not. :P
Phoemeister: I just had to share with you the genius of Smuckers
Phoemeister: LOL
Phoemeister: I guess not :P
Sarcasmyst7: *laughs* wahhhh
Phoemeister: Also funny: on the package it says "Gingham pattern is a trademark of the J.M. Smucker Company."

How can Smuckers own a copyright on Gingham?
Phoemeister: If I wear a gingham dress, are they going to sue me?
Sarcasmyst: lol
Sarcasmyst: Maybe just when it's jam related?
Sarcasmyst: *laughs* so nobody else can make jam in jars that look JUST LIKE THEIRS, eek eek
Sarcasmyst: might be FAKE Smuckers
Phoemeister: Not..... *organ music* FAKE SMUCKERS!
Sarcasmyst: Bum bum BUMMMMMMM.... Oh yes!
Phoemeister: *swoons*
Phoemeister: They should make a horror movie about fake smuckers
Sarcasmyst: *laughs* taking over the world?
Sarcasmyst: sounds like type of squid
Phoemeister: LOL
Phoemeister: Well that squid better not be wearing the gingham pattern, or Smuckers(TM) is going to come down on it like a hurricane!